The study of the book of Isaiah with my family was really eye-opening. It opened our eyes to how much God loathes and hates this trait in mankind.
In this edition of Leke Alder’s Letter to Jil, He gives deep insight into this same trait. He calls it one of the greatest relationship destroyers on earth and tells how you can recognize it. It is called PRIDE. Let’s learn, friends. Read on…
1. Dear Jil, let me give you insight into one of the greatest relationship destroyers. It's named Pride! #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
2. Pride being pride it introduces itself with a capital "P". #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
3. Pride was the original sin. Long before Adam disobeyed God pride had occassioned Lucifer's fall. #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
4. His pride altered his relationship with God. (Pride destroys beautiful relationships). He was cast down from Heaven. #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
5. Pride always exerts gravitational pull on status. It's the nature of the disease to demote. Pride goes before a fall. #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
6. Pride has the ability to promote with a view to demote. #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
7. It's a very dangerous place to be in, in life when no one can correct you, or talk to you. #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
8. You become a government unto yourself, promulgating your own laws of relationship, treating people anyhow. #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
9. You legislate your own righteousness, create your own logic and justification. You're sovereign! #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
10. No authority figure can address you- not your father, not your mother, not your pastor, not the elderly, not your boss… #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
11. Not even God! Why, your future husband stands no chance! No one can correct you! #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
12. The irony of life is that those who can't take instruction are the most prone to dishing out instructions. #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
13. Invariably they become rude and insolent, their tone disrespectful and dismissive of others. #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
14. Why people are prideful in life beats me! Perhaps because of money, status, power… But how can a blessing become a curse? #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
15. What do we have that we've not received?! #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
16. You can't destroy your primary relationship or the important relationships in your life because of status or money. #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
17. If you do you're not wise. In your old age you'll be full of regrets. #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
18. Don't know if you've ever heard of a man called Marc Rich. He's dead now. #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
19. A self described "workaholic, a loner, a money machine," he was one of history's most successful commodities traders. #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
20. He was a fugitive from American law but was controversially pardoned by President Clinton at the end of his tenure. #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
21. Marc Rich was money successful but a life failure. #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
22. He regretted till the very end losing his first wife to his philandering and arrogance. He lost his second marriage as well. #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
23. He couldn't attend the funeral of his daughter in 1999, and couldn't go and bury his father. He was running from the law. #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
24. He lost all the important relationships in his life. And to what?! #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
25. But maybe we can pardon Marc Rich. At least he had money. $2.5bn worth. But how do we explain empty pride? #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
26. There's the story of 2 combatants in a Lagos Danfo bus querying each other, "Do you know who I am?!" without a trace of irony! #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
27. In a relationship a prideful person sees him or herself higher than factuality. It's called delusion of grandeur. #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
28. A woman for example begins to act like she's doing her boyfriend or husband a favour. Based on nothing! #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
29. That kind of attitude often comes from a false sense of security- the belief he can't leave, that she holds the initiative. #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
30. But if the price of staying is too high the value of leaving grows higher. #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
31. When a man has two terrible options- Egyptians or Red Sea- he'll choose the one pointing to freedom, difficulty or not. #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
32. I'm sharing these things with you so you avoid the trap of pride. It creeps up on you, then becomes you. #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
33. How can you recognise pride in a relationship? #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
34. A prideful woman wants to have her way all the time. (Will deal with the subject of male pride in another letter). #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
35. She's very unforgiving of any PERCEIVED slight, such slight including not being allowed to have her way. #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
36. She'll exact revenge for every affront. She'll consider herself superior to every counsel, will talk to people in instructions.#Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
37. She'll be intolerant and touchy. She cannot subject herself to authority. She believes she knows it all! #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
38. You can't even approach her with the thought of suggestion of correction. She blocks everyone out. #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
39. She relies entirely on her limited worldview but believes strongly in this narrow band of wisdom. She's controlling. #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
40. Such a person will be emotionally repugnant. All her good qualities will suffer massive devaluation. #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
41. Men will be wary of becoming emotionally entangled. You can't correct her, not even for her own sake. She'll turn insolent. #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
42. She's rebellious to authority as a principle of life. Making marriage near impossible. Marriage is a governmental institution. #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
43. She'll never admit wrong, would rather die than admit needs or frailty. Yet the needs are obvious! #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
44. Can't even admit she needs a man! It's the other way round. She can never admit she's in love either. #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
45. In a breakup she'll be pained she's not the one who took the initiative. #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
46. She'll be sore at the missed opportunity to exact appropriate vengeance. That pain won't subside. #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
47. She's a judge of the conduct of others yet cannot be judged. What she does to others she cannot abide. #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
48. She's unforgiving. Can hold grudges for years. She must not be offended. The slightest offence takes days to process. #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
49. Slights are never forgotten. They're stored. Will be ressurected at an opportune time as a nagging premise. #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
50. She'll rather feed on slight, chew the curd of malice, bloat her stomach with grudge. #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
51. So tell me, how can anyone be happy in a relationship with an unforgiving and prideful person?! #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
52. She soon becomes HARDENED, like a Julius Berger concrete boulder. Unforgiveness is a hardener. #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
53. Please don't fall into this trap. Be humble. Pride leads to regret and loneliness. #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
54. A rebellious attitude is antithetical to wholesome relationship. #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
55. Being head strong is not a relationship virtue. Stubborness has a price. #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
56. A relationship must not be a contest of wills. Where then is harmony, where's love, where's oneness? #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
57. If every issue becomes a contest (including going to the movie) the soul becomes wearied. #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
58. If you're above correction you can't have a successful relationship. #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
59. You'll be oblivious to your faults. Pride creates its own justification, and self-righteousness. #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
60. But I believe better things of you. I have written just to warn you about hidden traps in life's forest. #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
61. As you go into marriage be on the look out. Be humble. Pride is a demolition expert. #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
62. If you don't humble yourself your beautiful relationship will become a monument to marital failure. #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
63. I wish you the best in your forthcoming nuptials. Your mentor, LA. ©Leke Alder talk2me@lekealder.com #Letr2Jil
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) November 9, 2013
Cheers.
