It’s Leke Alder again with another Letter to Jack. I titled this one – What is Love?
1. Dear Jack, there's a lot we need to learn about this animal called life. (I've chosen to be a student of life). #Letr2Jack
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) August 24, 2013
2. The philosophy of life we adopt determines the outcome of our lives. Choose your philosophy carefully I'd say. #Letr2Jack
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) August 24, 2013
3. The source of the philosophy of life we adopt must be proven, comprehensive in scope and robust. #Letr2Jack
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) August 24, 2013
4. It cannot be limited or developed solely from our circumstances and experience. #Letr2Jack
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) August 24, 2013
5. That's the surest way to end up as prisoners of our circumstances and difficulties. #Letr2Jack
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) August 24, 2013
6. A young lady shot a riposte the other day (though sarcastically I must add): #Letr2Jack
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) August 24, 2013
7. How can one say that love heals she asked. Is it not love that breaks hearts and leaves so much pain in its wake? #Letr2Jack
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) August 24, 2013
8. Here's the problem: she has formulated a philosophy of life from a painful experience. #Letr2Jack
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) August 24, 2013
9. The man simply known as Paul once analogically referenced the clinical seperation of bone joints and marrow. #Letr2Jack
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) August 24, 2013
10. But our lady took a crude cleaver into the analysis of her life experience instead of using a surgeon's scalpel. #Letr2Jack
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) August 24, 2013
11. She couldn't see that love did not cause her pain. A boyfriend did! #Letr2Jack
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) August 24, 2013
12. And obviously like all of us at one point or the other, does not understand what love is. #Letr2Jack
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) August 24, 2013
13. She's unwittingly bought into the off the shelf romance novel characterisation of love as heartache. #Letr2Jack
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) August 24, 2013
14. And so you have a philosophy of life erected on the wobbly scaffold of false premises. #Letr2Jack
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) August 24, 2013
15. From incorrect analysis, and over generalisation from extremely limited data she's set herself up for more pain. #Letr2Jack
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) August 24, 2013
16. She arrived at her conclusion from maybe one or two personal experiences. That's a paucity of data. #Letr2Jack
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) August 24, 2013
17. You can see that it's a very short leap to characterisation of men in general. #Letr2Jack
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) August 24, 2013
18. We must avoid building our life philosophy from bad experiences, least a lonesome experience. #Letr2Jack
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) August 24, 2013
19. We can't draw far reaching conclusions from very limited data. And we must avoid philosophical imbalance. #Letr2Jack
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) August 24, 2013
20. Suppose shortly after this statement our lady had met a wonderful and loving gentleman. #Letr2Jack
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) August 24, 2013
21. Her definition of love as something that hurts would have become inconsistent and false. #Letr2Jack
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) August 24, 2013
22. We can't build a life philosophy from emotional reaction to experiences. It is yet another dangerous approach. #Letr2Jack
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) August 24, 2013
23. Emotion is a thermometer, a barometer, a fuel and a medium of expression of feelings. #Letr2Jack
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) August 24, 2013
24. We cannot confuse the thermometer with temperature. #Letr2Jack
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) August 24, 2013
25. And if thermometer is not temperature, emotion cannot be love. #Letr2Jack
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) August 24, 2013
26. Emotion is an expressor. Don't forget it can express anger too! You can't mistake the typewriter for thoughts. #Letr2Jack
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) August 24, 2013
27. By the same token we can't confuse sex for love even though we use both terms interchangeably. #Letr2Jack
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) August 24, 2013
28. Sex is a physical progression of sensual and libidinous desire, it is not love. You can have sex without love. #Letr2Jack
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) August 24, 2013
29. The obvious question then is, what is love?! #Letr2Jack
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) August 24, 2013
30. Is love the swooning of a young woman at the sight of an adonis? #Letr2Jack
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) August 24, 2013
31. Is it tachycardia – the fast beating of the heart from the excitement of meeting someone we gel with? #Letr2Jack
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) August 24, 2013
32. Is it the romance novel scenario of impossible relationship or the Mills & Boon heartbroken variety? #Letr2Jack
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) August 24, 2013
33. Is it sex? "Let's make love" is a common expression. What is love? #Letr2Jack
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) August 24, 2013
34. Love is not emotions as I pointed out though emotion has its value. #Letr2Jack
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) August 24, 2013
35. I would never know how I feel about someone without emotions. It's a translator of feelings. #Letr2Jack
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) August 24, 2013
36. When we say, "I'm in love with her" we are vocalising in human language our deep feelings and desire for someone. #Letr2Jack
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) August 24, 2013
37. But feelings can be fleeting and deceitful. Lust often masquerades as love. #Letr2Jack
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) August 24, 2013
38. The classic definition of love presumes a wholesomeness of relationship beyond lust and fickleness. #Letr2Jack
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) August 24, 2013
39. It presents an ideal of aspiration; it is a litmus test of the true state of our heart towards someone. #Letr2Jack
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) August 24, 2013
40. It helps us determine if lust or true love is speaking, helps us to know who truly loves us and who is loving. #Letr2Jack
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) August 24, 2013
41. In just four verses it condenses the indefinable into practical barometer. #Letr2Jack
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) August 24, 2013
42. It was penned, again by that scholar and theologian Paul. (His writings are unsurprisingly studied in universities). #Letr2Jack
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) August 24, 2013
43. I consider his treatise on love one of the most incredible literary expressions and I doff my heart. Let's hear him: #Letr2Jack
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) August 24, 2013
44. "Love endures long and is patient and kind; love is never envious nor boils over with jealousy. #Letr2Jack
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) August 24, 2013
45. (Love) is not boastful or vainglorious, does not display itself haughtily. #Letr2Jack
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) August 24, 2013
46. (Love) is not conceited (arrogant and inflated with pride); it is not rude (unmannerly) and does not act unbecomingly. #Letr2Jack
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) August 24, 2013
47. Love does not insist on its own rights or its own way, for it is not self-seeking; it is not touchy or fretful or resentful. #Letr2Jack
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) August 24, 2013
48. (Love) takes no account of the evil done to it [it pays no attention to a suffered wrong]. #Letr2Jack
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) August 24, 2013
49. (Love) does not rejoice at injustice and unrighteousness, but rejoices when right and truth prevail. #Letr2Jack
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) August 24, 2013
50. Love bears up under anything and everything that comes, is ever ready to believe the best of every person. #Letr2Jack
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) August 24, 2013
51. Its hopes are fadeless under all circumstances, and it endures everything [without weakening]. #Letr2Jack
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) August 24, 2013
53. What a piece! #Letr2Jack
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) August 24, 2013
54. Look at all the fantastic relationships around you, look at the most loving people you know; you'll see these verses in them. #Letr2Jack
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) August 24, 2013
55. This is the prescription for enduring relationships. But what a standard! #Letr2Jack
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) August 24, 2013
56. We can evaluate ourselves by these standards. The key is not to give excuses or create justifications. #Letr2Jack
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) August 24, 2013
57. The key is humility. And honesty. Will you be humble? And will you strive for noble ideals? Your mentor, LA #Letr2Jack ©Leke Alder
— Leke Alder (@LekeAlder) August 24, 2013
Need I say more?
